Joseph’s Incredible Testimony to His Brothers – How Will You View Circumstances?

“…And his brethren could not answer him; for they were troubled at his presence. Now therefore be not grieved, nor angry with yourselves, that ye sold me hither: For God did send me before you to preserve life. And God sent me before you to preserve you a posterity in the earth and to save your lives by a great deliverance. So no it was not you that send me hither, but God:…” Genesis 45:3b,5,7-8a

Can I shout a huge “Amen!! HalleluYah!!!”??? :o)

Sisters, Joseph understood something profound, that few of us ever do!! Think about it. Joseph’s brothers had just caused him extreme pain and hurt by rejecting him, hating him, and then actually selling him as a slave because of that hatred! They didn’t understand what Yhwh was doing in his life, all they knew was, they wanted him gone! Some wanted to kill him, but it was finally decided that they would simply sell him as a slave, so they did.

Years go by and we see what Joseph was put through. If being a slave wasn’t bad enough, he ended up being sent into the dungeon for years, after once again, getting what he did not deserve! He didn’t do anything and was falsely accused, arrested, and thrown into the dungeon because of that false accusation! As we’ve talked about this before, all this took place between the time that Yhwh showed Joseph in a dream what He was going to do with his life, and actually bringing him to the place where He fulfilled that dream.

After years with no contact from his family, his brothers show up. I can understand their concern. They knew what they had done and they felt guilty because of it. But Joseph, now more than ever, looks back and realizes all that hurt, all that pain that his own precious family caused him, was for a purpose and apart of Yhwh’s plan! IT WAS NEEDED!!! In order for Yhwh to use Joseph to save his family, Yhwh had to send him into Egypt. Yhwh had simply chosen to use his brothers to get him there (for honestly, how else could He get him to Egypt as a slave?). Yhwh understood what had to happen to prepare Joseph and get Joseph to the point where He needed him to be. All that happened, needed to happen…it wasn’t for naught! And more than ever before, Joseph saw the hand of Yhwh in it all. He realized, that although Yhwh may have had to use his own family to carry out what needed to be done, it wasn’t his family doing it. They were just the people Yhwh chose to use, but it was Yhwh being gracious and loving to Joseph’s family by sending Joseph through all that He did, so that He could save his family from the famine!

Sisters, when Yhwh sends us through tough circumstances, even extremely hurtful and painful circumstances, even using the very closest and dearest people to your heart to inflict that pain in your life, how do you react? Do you become angry and bitter towards them? Or do you stand back and choose to view such circumstances through Yhwh’s eyes? The world would say that Joseph had every right to get angry, hurt, and bitter at his brothers for the pain that they had caused him. But Joseph knew better!!! He saw the bigger picture. He knew who was in charge of the circumstances and it wasn’t his brothers. He saw that all this was needed, for Yhwh to accomplish His will in his life, and so for Joseph, there was absolutely no remorse, no hatred, no anger or bitterness, only love, forgiveness, compassion, mercy and grace towards them!

In my life, I can see how Yhwh has allowed me to walk through some tough circumstances too, albeit different from Joseph’s. But they have been hard and painful, nonetheless. But, like Joseph, I saw and see the larger picture. I know what Yhwh has called me to be, where He has called me to serve, and I knew I wasn’t where or who I needed to be, to accomplish what He had called me to accomplish. Yhwh knew what would bring me to that place of preparedness, like nothing else could! I knew He was sending me through the fire, not because He didn’t love me, but because He did, and He needed me to learn to rely fully upon Him, to trust Him to accomplish what He had said He would, to trust Him to lead me alll the way, to understand that He would never ever leave me or forsake me, and to teach me how to pray…really pray (among other things). I knew Who was behind it. Like Joseph, I knew it wasn’t the ones Yhwh chose to use to teach me those needed lessons and bring me to that point of total surrender, trust, love, faith, and prayer! I’m not the least bit angry or bitter, in fact, like Joseph, I think I can heartily say I am truly grateful and thankful for Yhwh loving me enough to send me through those fires, because I see more than ever, how needed those lessons have been!! And I honestly don’t know how He would have taught them to me, had He not used the very people who He did.

Girls, HE KNOWS!

Step back and view Yhwh’s hand in your life! Realize He is in control! He knows what He has called you to, He hasn’t forgotten! But like Joseph, in order for him to be used, Yhwh had to send him through various painful trials! Are you willing to be used by your God? Are you willing to step back and see the larger picture and realize it isn’t the people who He uses, but that it is He alone, trying to lovingly prepare you and bring you to your Egypt so He can use you! He could have chosen a number of other people to do it, but really, would it have had the effect that it had, if He had chosen someone else? Does not our God know above and beyond how to prepare us? Do you not think He knew who to use to teach you those lessons? Don’t become discouraged, despair, distraught, angry, or even bitter over the circumstances in your life. Praise Yhwh that He is in control and that He knows and cares!

For sisters, when you begin to view life through His eyes, you too, will be able to look at them and say, “It wasn’t you! Yhwh simply chose to use you, but it was my God doing “_”! I love you all so very much! Don’t be angry with yourselves or distraught over what happened! I’m certainly not! Can’t you see Yhwh’s hand in it all?! Isn’t it beautiful how He used you, for now I am in the place where I can provide for you all!” I can just imagine how healing that was for his brothers to hear and to see! What a testimony!!

We have got to get passed looking at the small picture of life, and begin looking at the larger picture! Sisters, stop looking at the circumstances, and start looking at your God and His plan! It makes all the difference in the world, as Joseph’s life proclaims!

I’ll leave you with the song, which has been so dear to my heart for as long as I can remember! Remember, you may not understand it all, but He does!

Shabbat Shalom!

Posted in Choices, Godly Daughterhood, Intentional Living, Serving Yahweh, Trusting God | Leave a comment

How Does Our Lives Compare to Scripture?

Shabbat Shalom my precious sisters!

Today I have been meditating and pondering quite a few passages of scripture, with the constant question of “Are we (am I) the pure and spotless Bride of Yahshua that we are supposed to be?” “Do we (am I) comparing ourselves amongs ourselves…or are we comparing ourselves against Yhwh’s standards and against His Word?”

My father preached on the word “feast” this morning and how in scripture the English word is actually multiple Hebrew words, meaning anything from appointed time to a banquet/feast. But there were a couple of verses that really stuck out to me and spoke deeply to me and got me pondering even more indepth the questions that I have had going through my mind lately. “How does my life line up with scripture? Where am I not in obedience? How can I serve my King even moreso? How can I become the Bride that He desires me to be?”

So having had these thoughts already running through my head this week, these verses really made me stop and really meditate upon them, which upon doing, brought more scriptures to my mind which I wanted to share with you. Here are the verses that we read this morning…

Hosea 2:11 I will also cause all her mirth to cease, her feast days, her new months, and her sabbaths, and all her solemn feasts.

Amos 5:21 I hate, I despise your feast days, and I will not smell in your solemn assemblies.

Amos 8:10 And I will turn your feasts into mourning, and all your songs into lamentation; and I will bring up sackcloth upon all loins, and baldness upon every head; and I will make it as the mourning of an only son, and the end thereof as a bitter day.

Isaiah 5:12 And the harp, and the viol, the tabret, and pipe, and wine, are in their feasts: but they regard not the work of Yhwh, neither consider the operation of his hands.

Why is Yhwh going to cause all the mirth to cease in our feasts and Shabbats? Why will He hate and despise the way we are keeping His feasts? Why will they be turned into mourning and our songs of joy into lamentation? Is it not because we/they are not keeping them the way that He has prescribed? Is it not because we are no longer a spotless Bride and sin rules our lives instead? Is it not because we have left our first Love? Song, dancing, and joy is not what the feasts are about, although they are certainly included within them…but have we replaced the meaning and purpose of the feast days (Shabbat included!) with them?

As I pondered these verses, I had to stop. Is the way that I am keeping His feasts and laws, pleasing in His sight? Or is the way that I keep His holy, set apart times, displeasing in His eyes?

These verses followed the previous ones in my mind…

Nehemiah 9:2-3 And the seed of Israel separated themselves from all strangers, and stood and confessed their sins, and the iniquities of their fathers. 3 And they stood up in their place, and read in the book of the law of Yhwh their God one fourth part of the day; and another fourth part they confessed, and worshipped Yhwh their God.

Isaiah 58:13-14 If thou turn away thy foot from the sabbath, from doing thy pleasure on my holy day; and call the sabbath a delight, the holy of Yhwh, honourable; and shalt honour him, not doing thine own ways, nor finding thine own pleasure, nor speaking thine own words: 14 Then shalt thou delight thyself in Yhwh; and I will cause thee to ride upon the high places of the earth, and feed thee with the heritage of Jacob thy father: for the mouth of Yhwh hath spoken it.

The question that keeps coming to my mind is, are we (and this applies to me more than anyone!) keeping His law the way that He intended, or have we filled these set apart days, with our own thoughts, actions, pleasure, words, etc? Yes, I greatly believe that they are supposed to be a time of rejoicing and great gladness! I am NOT against this.

But, have we replaced His days, filled His days, with our own thoughts, doing what pleased us or what we desired to do, during them? Stop and ask yourself this question. Are they pleasing to Him? Put the feasts days aside…does our every day lives, please Him? Who do we live for? Who do we live to please? Do we try to come up with excuses to not obey Him, or do we try to live our lives in obedience to His Word? In light of Him as our Judge, how do we balance out? If He was standing before you, what would He say? How would He Judge? Would we truly hear, “Well done, thou good and faithful servant?” Or would we hear, why have you left and departed from my ways? Why do you try to come up with every excuse possible, to not obey and follow my ways, yet convince yourself that you are honoring and obeying, Me?

Our feasts and Shabbats are filled with wonderful delicious tasting foods, fun times, singing and dancing, even the reading of scripture. But I can’t help but wonder, is it all about Him, or all about us having a good time? Do we use these times to compare ourselves against His word and His standards? We see the people thirsting after righteousness! They are standing reading, confessing, worshiping their Creator! It was a time of drawing into His presence, becoming One with our Bridegroom, cleaning house (getting the spot and wrinkle out of our garments), so to speak. Yet sadly, this isn’t what I see when I look around me or at me.

2 Corinthians 10:12 says, “For we dare not make ourselves of the number, or compare ourselves with some that commend themselves: but they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise.”

Yes, we may look around us and say that we are living a better life than some, and that may be true. But Yhwh tells us that those of us comparing and measuring ourselves among ourselves, ARE NOT WISE! Other people’s standards do not matter one bit. What they do is between them and their God. But how are we living our lives? Are we living a righteous and obedient lifestyle according to His Word?

How many of us, if someone came up to us and talked to us about having a time of prayer and confessing our sins to the Father, would ask, “Confess what?” Are we so hardened and proud that we don’t even acknowledge how far we have strayed from His ways?

Sisters, I plead with you to take some time away from everything and everyone, to be alone with your Maker, your Groom, and your God. Let Him search your heart and see if there be any wicked way in you. Yhwh says, “If MY people, which are called by MY NAME, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.” (2 Chronicles 7:14) applies to us! He is talking to His people, not the heathen. It is we who need to humble ourselves, pray, seek His face, and turn from our wicked ways, so that He can forgive our sins and heal our land. It has to start with us!! It isn’t just everyone else that has some confessing to do before the Father, it is us. May we truly become a clean, spotless, and pure Bride for our Bridegroom, Yahshua! May we truly pour out our lives and pour out our hearts in obedience to Him, serving Him and seeking Him with our whole heart!

Many Blessings and Much Love,


Posted in Challenges, Convictions, Faith, Godly Daughterhood, Loving God, Serving Yahweh | Leave a comment

Shabbat Shalom and Lessons From the Life of Joseph

Shabbat Shalom!!
I can hardly believe Shabbat is almost gone already and I have to say, each Shabbat I just long to be just a bit longer! To hold onto it as long as I can! They are so precious, so dear! I love those times to spend with Him and learn at His feet!! As much as I spend time with Him throughout the weeks, there is just something really special about Shabbats!! 

Where do the days and hours go?! Oh! my precious Abba, help us make the most of the time you have blessed us with!! Help us keep our focus on you and not allow the distractions of Ha’Satan to get to us or take our eyes off of you!!! Amein!
As I was praying about what to share, Yhwh placed the life of Joseph on my heart and I knew I needed to share what He had shown me this morning. I’ll explain this in a second, but before I go into what Hehas shown me, I want to do some boasting on my Wonderful God, Yhwh Almighty!! My Lover, my friend, my Abba, and my Provider!
Recently, Yhwh blessed my family with a new (for us) living room set! Its beautiful and was so needed, and has been a huge blessing!! 
But we still had one more need. We had a corner chair that had just had it, after so many years of good use! But as much as we kept our eyes open for the right one, nothing came up. Then, on my way out of town to run some errands with mom yesterday, we passed a small yard sale at the end of the main road we live off of…and what did we see?! But a beautiful, dark brown recliner that would be perfect!! So we asked them about it, but they said they had just sold it, and the people were getting a truck to pick it up. So I got back into the car and told mom it “must not be meant to be”. 
But on the way back home after running errands, I had totally forgotten that I had wanted to stop in at the hardware store for some needed dowels for a spice organizer I was going to be making. I had remembered just before reaching town, but then it went right back out of my brain!!! Now girls, don’t laugh!!! This is living proof that NOT remembering is SOMETIMES a blessing from Yhwh!!
So I get home and my brother and I begin this project and…I finally remember!! I had forgotten my dowels!! So after thinking about it, and feeling like I should run back into town for the needed supplies so I could finished, my brother and I head back into town for the second time! :-/

But as we reached the end of the main road, I couldn’t believe my eyes! Hours later and the chair was still there! So I slow down and ask them if it was still available and she yells back “your the girl who asked about it earlier!!! YES!!! The people never showed back up!!” So I pull over and ask them how much? Did I hear them right?! It was only $50!!! Now I know how much these things go for!!! So I quickly call home and get a confirmation, we definitely wanted it! ???? 
Well long story short, Yhwh showed me how had I not forgotten, and had He not had that “bump” in my day, He wouldn’t have been able to provide for us!! And sometimes He just wants to bless us in a round about way!! 

Had I not listened and gone back, we wouldn’t have been blessed with it, because I wouldn’t have been in the place where He needed me to be!

Girls, keep this in mind as I share what Yhwh showed me this morning about Joseph.
How many of us think about Joseph as a man who got into trouble because he didn’t have a second person in the house with his masters wife? Which we can definitely learn from for sure!! We also know Yhwh used Joseph to provide for his family…but again, most focus on the fact that his brethren were jealous because of the favoritism his father showed to him. And again, I can totally see how we can learn from this! ALL scripture is there for our learning.

But what I want to share with you is this…
Joseph was honored and loved greatly by both his earthly father and His heavenly father. His earthly showed his love by honoring him with his robe. Yhwh loved him and gave him dreams and visions of what his future held, telling him for what was about to happen.
But can you imagine what Joseph thought? He knew knew KNEW Yhwh was going to make him a ruler! But his own brothers just sold him into slavery and then he was sent to a dungeon as a later prisoner!! What happened to the dreams and visions Yhwh had given him??? But through all this time, we have not even one account of Joseph ever complaining or doubting Yhwh or what He told him would happen. He bloomed wherever Yhwh had him.

But after all he had been through, Yhwh eventually brought him up from the dungeon and placed him as a leader and ruler…what Yhwh had showed him, did come true! 
So as I pondered this, I wondered why? Why did Yhwh allow him to go through all this BEFORE making him a ruler and leader? The answer made me stop. Yhwh HAD to bring him into slavery and into that dungeon, so he could have Joseph where He needed him to be, so He COULD make him a ruler to save His people!! 
Sisters, has Yhwh showed YOU something, yet you find yourself wondering why it isn’t happening the way you envisioned it? Have you ever thought that Yhwh knows EXACTLY what you need to learn and where you need to be, so He CAN use you??
This is what He showed me. I sat back and thought through my life and realized my God is soooo good and soooo loving!!! Yes, we too, may be sent through some tough times! But atleast for me, I KNOW those times were so needed in my own life!! I know what Yhwh is calling me to, but I also knew I wasn’t strong enough for it. He knew that. Yhwh knew how to prepare me physically and spiritually! He knew how to bring me to His throne, to bring me to my knees, and in complete dependence upon Him in my life! I needed all this and I thank Him from the depths of my heart for all He has taught me!
Is it always wonderful going through? No, I can honestly say it isn’t. I’m sure Joseph didn’t love his dungeon life, either! But through that time, Yhwh brought him to the EXACT place he needed to be, so Yhwh could put him into the place and position he needed, so He could use him the way He needed to!

David was anointed King lonnnngggg before he actually ruled as King! Yhwh had to bring him through some tough things before He got Him to the exact place where He could set him up as King.
And so I realized in my own life. How often does He send us through things and we ask Him “why?!”, yet sisters, instead of doubting His wisdom in it, why not seek Him on our knees? surrendering our all to Him and ask Him how He is trying to prepare us and in which ways He is training us in? 

Do you see the difference? Do you bloom even in the hardest, toughest, of times? Do you thoroughly serve Him, with your whole heart, soul, mind, and strength, and allow Him to bring you where you need to be, so He CAN use you? Only He truly knows how to prepare you!! Sisters, will you trust Him in your preparation? Will you even THANK Him for bringing you to wherever you need to be brought to, so He CAN use you?
I truly thank my God for all His loving ways towards me!!! If it takes Him bringing me to the “dungeon”, to make me who HE needs me to be, so HE can use me to the fullest, oh, how I pray I will be the best dungeon prisoner that dungeon has ever seen!!! A girl who, like Daniel, got down upon her knees and worshipped her God, no matter what the cost was!!! Who, if sent to the lions den, never stops singing her Masters praises, knowing even in those places, He is there with me!! Girls, give Him your all!!!! Serve Him with everything you have!!! Don’t lose your focus!!! Ask Him how you can serve Him where you are and trust Him, girls!!!
Love you girls so much! Keep striving!! Keep running this race and remember, thank Him for whatever He calls you to walk through, knowing He promises to never leave you nor forsake you!! We ARE about to walk through some tough times!! As believers, we know we are!! Are we prepared for those times? Or will we break down because we have not allowed Him to prepare us to stand strong in Him? Girls, we can’t do it alone and we certainly can’t do it if we lose our focus!! We HAVE to have Him by our sides!!! Have you learned to fully lean upon Him and follow Him with all your heart? He deserves our full focus and our full obedience! Never stop seeking the face of your God!! 
May He truly bless each and every single one of you this coming week!

Blessings, Samantha

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Trusting Yhwh Like Our Forefathers Did

Our fathers trusted in thee, they trusted and thou didst deliver them. Psalms 22:4

As I was before my Heavenly Father this morning in prayer, I read this verse and it hit me so strongly! How did our fathers trust Him? I think over all Yhwh brought them through and wonder why I often struggle with something that seems so small in comparison. 

Think about Abraham, with him trusting Yhwh that Isaac was his chosen seed, and thus not doubting Yhwh when He asked Him to sacrifice him, knowing somehow, Yhwh would come through. Would He raise him from the dead? Or provide a lamb instead? But knowing Yhwh doesn’t lie, Abraham knew He could trust Him completely, and so he chose to walk in faith (trust in His God), instead of doubt, fear, and distrust.

Trust in Yhwh with all thine heart, and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. Proverbs 3:5-6 emphesis added

So the question remains, will we trust Yhwh like our forefathers did? Will we trust Him in all we go through and face? I think of the parting of the sea. If they dwelled on how vast and deep that sea was, instead of who their God and Abba was and what He was capable of doing, if they had leaned on their own understanding, instead of His, would the priests have ever put their feet in the water? Or would they have stood on the banks praying for Yhwh to do something, instead of trusting Him at His word? 

What if we are a Sarah, waiting for a promised son? When our so-called years of childbearing are past, will we chose to lean on mans understanding, or continue to trust our God, knowing that “he is faithful who has promised” (Hebrews 10:23b), and although we may not see how He will provide, we trust that He will?

Or what about Noah who had to wait over 200 years for the flood, yet never stopped preparing for what Yhwh told him would surely come? What if after a 100 years he gave up and decided to lean on his own understanding? What if he grew weary of the mocking and the toiling that he faced, year after year after year? If he didn’t keep on persevering and hold fast to the trust of his God, where would we be today?

I sit here and glance to my wall and a reminder I have on it. The word “stumble” in the Greek means to cease trusting the One who is absolutely worthy and deserving of our complete trust and obedience! The word “stumble” comes from the word “skandalizo” (sound familiar?!), in English we would say “scandal”! Its never “what happens” in life that is scandalous. Distrust for Him is the real scandal!

When you think of stumbling in your faith or trust for Yhwh in that light, it makes you stop and say “Whoa!”! At least it does me. It puts the depth to what distrust in our God, really is. Its not cute. Its not funny. Its scandalous. Its huge. Its a big deal.

And I write this to myself as much as to anyone. It was a reminder that my Heavenly Abba gave to me this morning, as I struggled and wrestled in prayer. The past few days have been a struggle. But as I came before my God this morning, once again I found the strength and encouragement that I needed to keep on going…to keep on trusting Him, even though I don’t understand. It reminded me of a time a precious friend and I spent  just replaying all that Yhwh has done in our lives. Looking back over the years, over the history of our forefathers, and seeing Who our God really is and what He really is capable of doing, can only give us hope! For our God changes not! 

So don’t let discouragement take root as you look around at all that is happening in the world and around you. Give your all to your Master and ask Him to lead your every step and girls, trust.your.God! When Satan tries to come in and make you discouraged, overwhelmed, and doubtful, know who he is!!! Be on guard! He is out to steal, kill, and destroy you! His goal in your life is to take you away from trusting and serving your God! Stand strong in the spirit of the living God and don’t take your armor off and drop your sword!!! That’s what he wants more than anything! When you are weary and tired of the battle, you have a Father waiting with open arms to strengthen and uphold you (Isaiah 41:10)! Go to Him in prayer and let Him strengthen and minister to you. For He loves His Bride…He loves YOU!!! 

Yhwh bless!

Posted in Uncategorized | 2 Comments

Musings from my journey in Israel

Israel, my beloved homeland…

Today I felt an overwhelming longing for my homeland. Its been 2 years, 2 months,    and 12 days since I left…but who’s counting? I picked up my Hebrew Bible and started reading Isaiah once again. It was for a different study I’m working on, but it brought back even more memories of 3 years ago next month when Yhwh had me read it over and over again, revailing His unconditional love for His people to me, and answering my hearts plea for a love like He had for them. 

Three years ago I was so convicted that my heart, having been in Africa since I became a believer, was in the wrong place. I remember crying out to my God, asking Him to forgive me, and give me a love for His people and His country like He had. I remember so clearly Him laying it on my heart that He was bringing me home the following Feb/March. I remember sharing it with my sister and brother in law. I had no idea how it would happen, but I just felt Him tell me it would.

I have to say, I was a half-hearted believer. I had longed to serve Him for 17 years…now that He had my heart in the right place, would He truly bring me there??? After sooooo many years???

I smiled through the tears as I reread my journal entries. Yes, March 25, 2014 Yhwh blessed me with the most amazing journey of my life! For the first time, my restless heart felt at home. I could hardly believe it…I was truly home!! 

As I read one account after another in my journal of the journey Yhwh brought me through while there, I couldn’t help but praise Him all the more!! So much of the trip I felt like I couldn’t soak it in enough! Would I ever tire of walking the beach, looking out over the most beautiful sea, hearing the conversations all around me??? I felt like asking Yhwh to please just pause the moment so I could catch up and just etch each memory deep within my heart! But of course, pausing life wasn’t an option.

I am soooo thankful for my taking the time to journal my thoughts, questions, and prayers through my stay. Yhwh blessed me so much there! And as I recounted all He taught me and showed me, I am once again overwhelmed at His goodness towards me!! 

I’m reminded of the sermons and Bible study I attended, especially the one on the 3 Points of Love and how the pastor shared how it’s God’s love that He sometimes allows trials into our lives, but asked us if we will still trust his love and trust Him through them? He told us to get on our knees and beg Him for His mercy and grace through the pain, but to never doubt His love. He shared with us about David’s love for his son, even tho he tried to kill him, and likened it to Yahshua’s love for us.

I’m then reminded of the Bible study where we young adults were reminded to guard agaist the tsunami that was coming and would kill the believers, spiritually, if we weren’t prepared. How we MUST spend time being strengthened by Yhwh and His Word! He shared scriptures about being in the end times and how Yhwh asks where are those of the faith and how He says we will be weak and few in numbers. He encouraged us to know and understand that hard times ARE coming and that our faith WILL be tested! But will we be taken off guard? Will we be strong in Yhwh until the end?

I felt so challenged by each testimony, study, and sermon. And as I go back over them in my mind, I find myself challenged and encouraged once more! Will we stand strong to the end? Will we love like Yahshua loves us? Will we trust Him?

I was brought back through my walk through Jerusalem and all Yhwh laid on my heart, to the passages in scripture that spoke so deeply to me, as I sat on the roof in my favorite place, to read, study, and pray. It was as if I was brought there once more, as I read on. 

I am so deeply grateful and thankful for that time! I had to smile as I read about my re-entry into the states and the incredibly overwhelming and culture shock that hit. In Israel I felt completely at home. It wasn’t a culture shock at all. But I remember standing outside of the airport as I fought tears of longing and an overwhelmingness and just longed to just hear Hebrew, a language of comfort, once more in all the craziness of Boston! As soon as I had finished my almost plea to Yhwh, out walks a Jewish family, speaking Hebrew!!! Awe, it was such a comfort and balm to this gals heart!

I glance down at my ring. It was a gift Yhwh gave me as a reminder of His abiding love for me, and a promise He’d never leave me nor forsake me, and that He would bring me back again. I remember the almost plea as I walked and conversed with Him in my heart that day. After all these years, He finally had me there, just as I finally felt at home and totally in love with His land and His people, and now He was sending me back? My heart was broken as I dreaded my upcoming departure. I just didn’t understand. Why after all He had done to get me there, after all those years, why did I now have to go back? He had my heart! Why send me back???

But I was gently reminded that I deserved none of this!! It was His gift to me and I needed to be thankful and grateful for it! And be thankful and grateful for wherever He sends me to serve, and for however long He sends me for. 

As I read that, all I could think was “Ouch!”!

It was a reminder that I so desperately needed to be reminded of today! Yes, my heart longs to be back home. It seems with each passing day, the restlessness grows deeper, the longing stronger! But then I hear His still small voice and I know I need to serve joyfully where He has me, for however long He has me, and that it is all a gift. I don’t and I didn’t deserve any of His gifts! Each day was a blessing; a gift. And as much as I know one day He’ll bring me back, I know I need to joyfully serve Him no matter where He has me! 

I glance down our road. My prayer is one for strength, comfort, and peace as I once again dig in and throw myself into where He has me, dreaming of the day He smiles and says “Now go!”! :) I often wonder, what will my reaction be? Tears of joy? Falling down on my knees in thanksgiving and praise at my return? Flying as fast as my feet will take me to a certain Hotel and into a certain lovely sisters embrace? Or up the street and into the house, running to look for another precious sister? I wondered at a sisters eagerness to instantly, upon her arrival to the house, to leave and run back down to the sea, back when I was there each day and took the sight for granted! Now I don’t wonder at her reaction any more and often think “will I even have the patience to drop my bags off before running back down to it?!” 

But even as I muse over my longing to be back, I think of all Yhwh has taught me since my being there, and I am truly grateful! I left with a strong impression and taste of what was to come, but Yhwh telling me my preparation wasn’t done yet. This is love. He never sends us unprepared! And I am thankful for my Saviours abiding love and care! But can I pray that my preparation is soon accomplished so I may return??? :)

Ah! May we all give our all to Him, and truly throw ourselves into wherever He has us!! Use this time wisely, sisters! Like the brother said, hard times ARE coming!! You need to be prepared to stand strong in Him!! How can you prepare to stand strong, today? Don’t wait until it is upon you! It will be too late at that point! Thank Yhwh for where He has you, and ask Him how you can prepare for the life He is calling you to live! It may not be at all like mine will be, but that doesn’t mean you don’t need to be in His school! Cherish this time and learn all you can! Soak the Word in! 

Shabbat Shalom!

Posted in Godly Daughterhood | Leave a comment

Menu Planning and Binder

Okay, the long awaited post about how I do our menu planning and the binder that I put together! :o)

For years, this has always been a sore spot for me. I was never one growing up that thoroughly enjoyed being in the kitchen cooking and so this was an area that I was determined to change! I always knew it was something that needed to be done (as the family does need to eat!! :o), but not something that I thoroughly enjoyed…until the last couple of months! Not only did I spend some time asking Yhwh to help me learn to thoroughly enjoy cooking meals that were not only nutritious, but also meals that my family and I thoroughly enjoyed eating! I am thrilled to say, He has thoroughly answered my prayers!! :o)

The first way He answered it was, in our friends sharing an amazing app with me, called AnyList. This app, although is only currently for the Iphone, you can get it for any pc, mac, etc, and simply use it on your computer. I can not tell you how this app has so richly blessed my life!!! It allows you to download recipes from the web right into the app. Others with the app can share recipes with each other, it allows you to print or email recipes to others, it has a calendar where you can add the recipes right into each day of the week, to see at a glance (as well as print out!), and last, but certainly not least, it has a list where you can add things to your shopping list! With this shopping list, you can go right into the recipe and click the circle next to each one, and it will drop it into the shopping list, so you know which items you need for each recipe!

 photo IMG_2564.jpg

You can see how in the picture I have the calendar with our recipes for this week added to each day. If I want to see what that recipe calls for, all I do is click on that day and the recipe I’m wanting to look at, and there it is! No searching through my recipes to find the correct one anymore! photo IMG_2566.jpg

Here you can see the actual recipe with the circles next to them (oh yeah! You can change the size of the recipe and it does all the calculations for you!)…this is where you can click it, and it will add that ingredient right into your shopping list! You can also see the list of recipes (which you can organize into separate categories to keep them all organized, as well as click on the “all recipes” folder to view them all).

 photo IMG_2565.jpg
Here you can see the shopping list…yes, it places each in its corresponding area in the store for you, and if it messes up, you can just drag it into the correct area, so while you are shopping, you aren’t bouncing all over the store, realizing that you forgot something in a certain area.

Needless to say, this has been a HUGE time saver, it has helped me to be organized, to be able to plan ahead, know what I need to pick up for that week’s recipes, be able to make sure things are pulled out of the freezer ahead of time, or prepared ahead of time, etc.! I cannot recommend this app more so! Not to mention that while I have a few minutes no matter where I am, the recipes are at my fingertips, so menu planning on the go is a breeze!!

The second way Yhwh really answered my prayer is, by showing me the blessing of Pinterest! Okay, don’t laugh! I know a lot of you have known about this for thing for a long time, but I just never really paid it much attention and just thought it was another thing that would just take up more of my time and be a time waster. I’m not even sure what made me check them out, accept that maybe it popped up when doing a recipe search…I honestly can’t remember! But regardless as to how I got going on it, it has been such a tremendous blessing in my life!!!

I knew one of the reasons I didn’t like to cook so much was because I didn’t really enjoy the food. It’s not that it wasn’t good, don’t get me wrong! It was. It just wasn’t the food that I thoroughly enjoyed eating! :o) We have never really been a family that did a whole ton of new recipes, and having it not really be “my type” of foods, cooking became just a “get it done and out of the way” mode for me.

For those who know me, know I absolutely love love LOVE Middle Eastern food! After being in Israel and tasting their food, I was sold!!! There wasn’t anything that I didn’t enjoy eating! But where do you find the recipes and learn how to cook all these dishes? Yep, Pinterest!!! I started doing a simple search and wow!!! The recipes just kept coming and looked soooooo, sooooo delicious!!!  I started pinning them, then went back and added them to this nifty little “AnyList” app!

After I realized that my family also very much enjoyed these types of dishes (after a few faces that asked “we’re going to eat this???” and my reply of “don’t comment till you try it, it’s delicious!!!!! :o) they asked me to keep them coming!

I then jumped into learning how to create these dishes all the more so…and with absolutely loving the foods, and so thoroughly excited about finally finding the recipes to the foods that I soooo missed since being in the Land, I ended up realizing at the same time, just how much I really, REALLY enjoy being in the kitchen, cooking!! :o) If I could, I would be in here all the time! But since I can’t, I try to get in as much as time will allow. :o)

After a week or two of making some of these meals, Mama asked me if I could come up with a two week menu plan, using the recipes I was coming up with. Wow! I had never really successfully done this, and I realized it was a lot more work than I once thought! I sat down (actually, I stood most of the day!:o) at the table, organizing the recipes, printing them off from the app, and putting them in plastic sleeves. She had asked me to come up with both lunches and dinners, so that meant 28 recipes. :o) I realized that I had WAY more recipes than this that I wanted to try, so the trouble for me was, which ones to try during the next two weeks! :o) Then came the chore of figuring out which meals to have when, etc.

Once I figured this all out, the next step was to put ONLY the recipes we were going to be using, in the 1″ menu binder, in the order that we were going to be making those recipes. All the rest of the recipes that I had collected and printed, were placed in a different, 3″ binder. Then I also printed off 2 copies of our menu. One copy went in the beginning of the Menu Planning 1″  binder, and the other went up on the Refrigerator. IMG_2558

The one on the frig I put notes as to what needed to be done ahead of time, so that each night I could check to see at a glance what was on the menu for the next day, and prepare for it.

The one that went into the binder was followed by that menu’s recipes. So I would have Week #1 Menu and then all its recipes and then Week #2 and all its recipes.



This kept it all together and regardless as to who was going to cook, they had everything that they needed, right in the binder, which I generally store on the counter.

Then as I made each recipe, I would ask my family if they liked it and if they did, then I would put 3 stars next to it (both menu and recipe). If it was one that they didn’t like, I would put a note next to it explaining so. If we weren’t able to make a certain recipe due to leftovers needing to be used up (never happens in our family! ;o)), I would put a line through that recipe on the menu page, so that I would know that that recipe wasn’t done yet, so I could move it to the next set that I did. It has been such an incredible blessing and I pray that it will be for you as well!!!

Posted in Godly Daughterhood, Learning, Preparing for Marriage, Reviews | Leave a comment

Pink and White Combination with Ribbons

Hello ladies,

I’d like to apologize ahead of time for the vivid and bold contrast color in these pictures. I am not sure why they came out so bold, but here they are anyway! I hope you enjoy them.

I bought the skirt for $6 at a “local” thrift store. These pretty, light-weight type skirts are rare here in Maine and it was a blessing to find this pretty white skirt in the timing I did!!

 photo 6e6f0bfc-d3bb-4c9b-8c54-bc5b1ffd2eb4.jpg
The white shirt was bought at a thrift store for about $2
Pink blouse: Thrift store for about $3. The blouse was slightly too big for me to the point of being baggy, so I sewed 2″ seems at the larger points (the waist) and then fanned them back out towards the armholes and hems.

 photo DSC05383.jpg
I split my bangs apart from the rest of my hair, then pinning them back, I pulled the rest of my bangs back into one of my favorite Flexi’s. I bought this ribbon at Hobby Lobby for my bookmark business, but really enjoy wearing pretty ribbons in my hair. :)

 photo DSC05440.jpg

Enjoy! :-)


Posted in Godly Daughterhood | Leave a comment

Shabbat Shalom!

Shabbat Shalom, my precious sisters!!!

My my my!!! What a week this has been!!! :o) As I was driving home tonight, the week and years (will explain this in a second) were being played through my mind and I found myself so full of love for my King!!

Sunday brought a day of celebrating my amazing mother and thanking Yhwh for blessing me with such an amazing Godly example of a mother and friend that she is!!

Monday found me so excited as I dug into my Hebrew studies even more, laughing at how I must look driving down the road, carrying on a conversation with my CD player, hands going, facial expressions that says it all, and the “Oh wait!!!! Zeh Sham, lo Zeh po!!!!” As I emphatically shake my head, laughing the whole time, realizing my mistake in giving the poor guy incorrect directions, but quickly correcting it! :o) For those who aren’t familiar with Primsleur language courses, they have a male and female having a conversation with each other, and then they will ask a question and you are given time to answer it, and then they will repeat the answer a few times, to make sure you get it correct. One time I glanced over at my brother who was sitting in the passenger seat beside me, to watch him grinning at me…and then I realize how funny I must look as my hands have been making constant gestures as I’m talking back to them! I never realized how much I talk with my hands until I started doing the Primsleur course, but I mean, how can you help it?! :o)

I thought over the week with all the blessings it held…Yhwh providing the complete Hebrew level 1 course for only $50! My being able to get our two week menu plan done and get our menu/recipe binder put together (will try to do a post about that soon), the blessing of a recipe/menu/shopping list app a friend shared with me called “AnyList” and how it’s been SUCH a HUGE blessing to me! Not to mention the bright green leaves coming into bloom, the grass turning into deep and lush bright greens, the birds chirping first thing in the morning, yes, I’m even thankful for the black flies (our Maine state bird…I mean fly!) as it means new life with Spring finally here…and who isn’t thrilled when the winter is past and gone?! Then I thought of the blessing of still being able to care for my grandfather, and Yhwh willing, showing him in part, the love of Yhwh!

I mean, the blessings are just sooo incredible and unending!!!

This week found me digging into scripture with a hunger and thirst, feeling like a young girl with a bowl of mint choc chip ice cream dangling just out of reach of her (can you guess what I could really go for right now?!)! I marvel at how the believer’s life comes and goes in waves. Sometimes it seems to take every ounce of my strength to even know how to pray, yet other times, I feel so close to my King, that it just naturally pours out of me! The same is with scripture reading and studying. At times I feel like I’m pushing against a rock wall, feeling like I’m just not getting anywhere, yet once I get past the “dessert”, I feel like I burst forth in bright sunshine, learning to love my King in new and deeper levels for having pushed through it, regardless about how I may have felt that day!!

As much as I know He is always there, I marvel how He allows us these struggles to learn to persevere in seeking His face all the more!

This week has been one of those “bursting sunshine” type of weeks, as I eagerly read His word, trying to put puzzle pieces together about the wilderness experiences. I know He’s calling me to deeper levels, and that’s part of the beauties of it all. As I read in Hosea about the wilderness, my mind flipped back to Ezekiel 20, how Yhwh again says He is going to bring us back into the wilderness, like He did in egypt. I find myself asking Him a ton of questions as I compare all He tells us about the first wilderness experience to that of the second one, striving to learn more not only about Himself, but myself and my people. What got us there in the first place? What is bringing us there the second time? What lessons did He try and teach us the first time around? What lessons/tests is He giving us the second time around? What can I learn from the first experience? How can I live my life in way that will see me, not marching around in the wilderness for another 40 years, but marching out of the wilderness, into the promise land, like Joshua and Caleb did?

I thought of this week and all I’ve learned, and how blessed I have been to be going through the “counting the omer” prayer challenge (see and the bottom of this page which has a table of the number and their meanings ) and really doing a heart search, I’ve just found myself so in love with my Ishi (Hosea 2:16). I find my whole relationship with Him just blossoming to new and deeper levels than ever before!

Then I think back over this week and how I got to listening to George Washington’s incredible story and the man of Yhwh that he was; how although he was up agaisnt soooo much, his motto was “There is but one course, and that is to seek truth and to preserver, steadily”. I had no idea that he was only 22 when he was combing bullets out of his hair and his clothes were torn from the bullets ripping through them, but never once entering into his body! He was only 22 when the Indians (or was it the British??) announced that there was a Higher Power keeping him alive and that it was impossible to kill him! He had 5 horses shot out from underneath him, but never once did he back away from the battle, or retreat! He would just jump on another horse and keep charging and encouraging his men to keep their spirits up. When he became president of this country, as soon as they were finished with the ceremony, he didn’t praise himself or become prideful that he was chosen unanimously! No, what you saw was an extremely humble man of Yhwh! He immediately left the hall and headed straight out of the door and down to the church, went in and fell to his knees in earnest prayer, asking Yhwh for wisdom, knowledge, and strength in how to bring this nation together and carry out all that he needed to, knowing that if the people weren’t pulling together (which they weren’t) beforehand, but instead who were often fighting hard against him, that he had his work cut out! His prayer life, courage, and dedication were so inspiring!

Then today I had the privilege of listening a book Helen Keller wrote about her life called “The Story of My Life” and again, I sat there and felt so blessed! This girl who was both deaf and blind, stood against all odds and not only learned to speak, read, and write, but she learned not only how to speak, but how to read about 5 different languages!! One of which was German (her favorite)! She didn’t let these limitations stop her from becoming all she could be for her King. She said yes, it took quite a lot of doing, it was extremely hard at times, but she persevered and it paid off in untold blessings! She crocheted and knitted, climbed trees, canoed, sailed, rode her pony, crossed a rail road bridge (she did NOT recommend even a person with their sight doing this!) and had to get underneath it in record time with her little sister, as the train buzzed overhead, and then make her way back up to the small tresses and over to safety!

Near the end of her book, she said, “Is it not true that, that my life with all its limitations, touches as many points the life of the world, beautiful? Everything has its wonders, even darkness and silence. And I learn that whatever state I may be in, therein to be content. Sometimes it is true, a sense of isolation enfolds me like a cold mist, as I sit alone and wait at life’s shut gate. Beyond there, is light, and music, and sweet companionship, that I may not enter. Fate, silent, pitiless, bars the way. Fain would I question His imperious degree, for my heart is still undisciplined and passionate, but my tongue will not utter the bitter futile words that dries to my lips, and they fall back into my heart like unshed tears. Silence sits immense upon my soul. Then comes hope with a smile and whispers that its joy in self-forgetfulness. So I try to make the light in others eyes, my sun. The music in others ears, my symphony. The smile in others lips, happiness.” (Chapter 22 of “The Story of My Life”). What a testimony this precious sister was and is!!!

After I finish this book and ponder the amazing testimony of this girls life, struggles, and victories with Yhwh’s strength, I then turned my music on random as I finish the last leg of our journey home. What better way to enter into Shabbat. I smiled as I sat there listening to the songs Yhwh had playing, as my mind drifted to all His goodness once again! How the memories flooded my mind.

James Block starts to play Overcome

Next came a song from Lev Shalem

After that was a song that really spoke to my heart, and brought back a lot of memories of one of the most amazing grandfather’s a girl could ever wish to have! This is a beloved hymn of my adopted grandfather’s, Grandpa Schulte, who has been with His precious Lord for many a years now.

Day By Day

Up next was another favorite of mine! This song became so precious to me after I became a believer and as I prayed for those who have yet to know my Master. Through the years, it has only become all the more precious to me in so many, many ways.

Someone Is Praying For You


As all these were playing, my mind went back over the last 11 years. You see, today, 11 years ago, I was holding my precious sister, Sophia, for the first and only time. A little girl who Yhwh so richly blessed our family with, for 28 wonderful weeks! Then my mind went to this picture…

Sarah and I

This was taken almost 9 years ago, almost to the day. This is of Sarah and I, the little girl who I held for the last time, almost 7 years ago (and also almost to the day!). I thought of where Yhwh had me with Sophia and all He taught me through that, and again as I held this precious little girl 4 years later, and all He taught me through her life and death. To where He has me now. I thought about my precious nephew, who has now been with His maker for two years, and all Yhwh taught me through his life and death. Again, I marvel and smile and thank and praise Him!

There is absolutely no bitterness. No anger. Yes, I miss them all more than words will ever say! They all meant the world to me and always will. But with each one, Yhwh only drew me closer to Himself in ways I can’t even describe. I found myself thanking Him today for all three little ones, for blessing my life with them, for allowing me the immense privilege of loving each one!

There was a time in my life that I dreaded pain, trials, and storms. When I saw them coming, I would want to run from them with every ounce of my being! Yet, I smile tonight, as I realize what Yhwh has done within my heart. I no longer want to run from them, I want to embrace them, knowing He is right there beside me, cleansing me, purifying me, and making me His spotless bride! Through all these experiences and so many more, He has become the One in whom my soul loveth!

I look back through the years, and instead of grieving as I once did, I rejoice and thank Him for each one. I know now, more than ever before, it wasn’t because He didn’t love me, that He asked me to walk through these life’s trials. He asked me to walk through them, because of His love for me! He alone knows what lies ahead, and with each, He was drawing me ever closer to Himself in ways I never even saw.

I know I have talked a lot about storms and trials lately, but the truth is, everyone I talk to, seems to be in one type or another. The times, my friends, are getting much, much more intense! We are nearing our King’s return, and we have got to be sent through the purifying fire! He needs warriors who are strong and capable of going through the days ahead! It’s not for the faint at heart! He said even the very elect, if they could fall, they would. That’s pretty serious!

He needs us to KNOW KNOW KNOW who He is!! He needs us to utterly depend upon Himself, wholly depend upon Himself, and His strength, not our own, to see us through. Yes, as a precious friend once told me, diamonds are cut over and over and over again before they will shine their brightest! That cutting process, although painfully hard at times, is the purifying process. Let it draw you to your knees in complete worship and adoration! Your Lover, Your Ishi, truly loves you with an everlasting love!

And so, as I came home and sat down to my dinner, praising my Saviour for all the many, many blessings this week has held, and smiling at all the precious memories I have of these little girls, this song began playing on the playlist the children had running in the background. So I leave you all with Psalms 56 Light of Life sung by Sons of Korah.

Yes, my heart is full this Shabbat. It’s been a busy, full, but very blessed, week. It’s held so many wonderful memories. Some hard, but all dear and precious. And oh! How I so look forward to being on the other side of the river, running along side of my Beloved King, swinging all my precious little ones in my arms, hearing them shouting for joy! :o) How they must be having the time of their lives!!!

Alright, so now that you all have gotten a peek view into the last week of my life, I must sign off and go worship my King in all His splendor and majesty! Many blessings, my precious sisters! Keep running this race strong! The enemy is going to fight hard against you, but who is he in light of your King? What can he really do to you? Be strong and of good courage, for your Father has already won the battle…the enemy just don’t want us to realize that!! His time ruling this earth is about to end and he knows it! As scripture says, don’t think it strange when fiery trials come your way! Expect them…thank Yhwh for them…for if they never did, then we would have a WHOLE LOT more to be concerned about!!! :o) Oh, my precious girls, stay strong, “for the Father up above, is looking down on you”! He will never leave you nor forsake you! Get into the Word and learn to selflessly love your Ishi! Pour yourself into your marriage with Him and relish in His love for you, His beautiful Bride! Lailah tov!

Posted in Choices, Contentment, Godly Daughterhood, In loving memory, Loving God, Serving Yahweh, Studying His Word, Trusting God | 1 Comment

Blues and Snowflake-White combination

Shalom gals!

I hope you’re having a great day, being drawn closer to our Heavenly Father and Savior. I am so glad for Sabbaths! They are such a blessing from Yahweh our God. :)

Here is a few pictures of Samantha’s outfit, today. It is really pretty for Shabbats and other nice occasions that don’t require hard or dirty work. ;)

 photo a935e698-a6d1-44c5-aaa7-ee29af6e2ac3.jpg

She got both her sweater and skirt from the thrift-store. The sweater she paid around $2.99 for, and the skirt she got on our way back to Maine from a visit trip down south, in a thrift-store in either TN or VA, and she paid around $5.99. The heart necklace was a gift from a precious friend Sarah C., and the earrings were a gift from a precious friend, Adeline.  And of course her ring is from Jerusalem. :o)

 photo e7cb7951-d150-4ba7-bfa8-104bd3ef5f9a.jpg

Her long sleeve white shirt is also a thrift-store special for around $1.00. :o)
 photo 275129bd-c52e-4802-942c-b44e4a2b73cc.jpg

Blessings :)


Posted in Godly Daughterhood, Modesty Monday | Leave a comment

Marriage…It Takes Us All

Shabbat Shalom, my precious sisters!

I pray this week was a blessed one and finds you thoroughly enjoying your Groom this Shabbat!!

This past week seemed to fly by in some respects, yet was pack full to brimming, in others. But the week has had me pondering on one main subject…Marriage. Not really so much in the physical sense, but mainly in regards to our marriage with Yahshua, our Groom. (Or maybe I should say I’ve done a lot of comparing of the two lately! :o)

I’m not even really sure where to begin, but it is weighing so heavily upon my heart, that I couldn’t possibly go to sleep without trying to write and share with you some of the thoughts that has run through my head.

Lately I’ve been studying Song of Solomon, not only looking at it in the sense of the beautiful picture it shows us of a physical marriage, but even more so, what it shows us concerning the beauty of our heavenly marriage. And as I’ve pondered the two and what I have seen, my heart broke.

Marriage has always been so cherished by me. Something that I so look forward to experiencing one day. I knew what it was supposed to look like, and I so looked forward to sharing in that blessed picture!

I smile as I think of my precious parents. They have set such an incredible example for us children to follow! Yes, after almost 37 years of marriage, their eyes still glow with a love and passion for each other! If they are ever together, they are together. Holding hands. Sitting next to each other. Dad’s arm wrapped around mom’s shoulders. And when they are apart, they can hardly wait to be together again!! I can remember times when Mom needed to leave for a couple of days. This was EXCEEDINGLY rare times, but when it did happen, she would cry all the way down the driveway and road. She was already dreading each minute she would be away.

Sometimes, when Dad would leave his place by mom on the couch to go get something, we children would run and quickly sit next to mom, all the time grinning, knowing the scene which was about to take place! Dad would come back into the room and see that we had taken the seat next to mom! He would playfully tell us “no way!”. Then the fight was on…could we keep the couch just for a few minutes, as he teasingly fought to dislodged us from our place next to his Bride? We knew it was helpless, there was NO WAY he would ever give up being next to my mom!! If they were blessed to be in the same room, they WERE going to be sitting next to each other! But, being playful children that we are, even though we knew what the answer would be, we couldn’t help but give them a hard time!

The same would be true as we gather for prayer. Our family holds hands, as we pray for the meal. The scene is always the same…who will get Dad’s hand and mom’s other one? But sometimes…just sometimes (we are good SOMETIMES!!!)…we try our hardest to sneak in between them and see how long it takes for them to notice! Usually, only a couple of seconds! ;o)

If we’re playing a game, you can hardly ever get them not to be on a team! Sometimes, on VERY RARE occasions, if we are teaching a new group of people, or trying to train the younger ones in how to play, they will be on separate teams. But almost always, as much as we try to be on their team (I mean, who doesn’t want to be on Dad’s or Mom’s team????!), the answer is always the same…ummmm…NO! :o)

We keep the Niddah laws (Lev15) and as the week draws to a close, we watch them both studying the clock! When will sunset be here so they can once again, be in each other’s arms? They may not know when sunset is any other day of the week, but they will know on that day!!! And throughout the week of being apart, we get to watch them come up with as many ways as they can, to let the other one know just how much they love the other one! But oh, how we love those last few minutes on the clock! Dad will smile over at mom…5 more minutes…just 5 more minutes! Mom too, counts the minutes! Finally, the time is here! They run into each other’s arms!! Yes, it’s a sight to behold!

We smile as they still, after 36+ years of marriage, go out on dates just about every single week. Yes…just the two of them! “Children”, they will ask, “do you mind if we go out on a date tonight?” And off they go! They absolutely love spending time together. They are each others best friends, and it shows. Anyone who is around them for any length of time, sees it. You can’t help but see it. Their love is so pure, so genuine, so sincere! And such a testimony!

People ask me “do your parents ever fight?” No, they don’t. They may disagree once in a great while, but even that is never usually in front of us. To this day, I can not tell you where my parents disagree with one another. I know they don’t agree on everything, no couple does, but to the world, they are totally, 100%, united. They are pulling together, in one direction, and it is absolutely beautiful to behold! They have learned what it means to be one.

Yes, such a testimony, isn’t it? But this is the picture of marriage that I have been raised with! I have watched my parents show us children, by their actions, what a marriage is supposed to be like…and it only makes us long for our own, all the more! I mean, who wouldn’t want such a marriage?!

Now you will understand a bit more, what I am about to try to explain and what has gone through my mind. I have spent my life, learning how I too, could be that kind of wife. My whole life, I have watched how my parents relationship has only grown deeper and more beautiful by the day, and it has made me want to learn how I too, could have such an amazing marriage! I knew it would take work, they are always learning how they can have an even better marriage, and will be the first to say that it takes a lot of work! But that it is so worth the effort!

I remember listening to a sermon over and over and over again, as I grew up! It was on marriage, and the pastor was speaking to women on how to be that hidden woman. He shared an amazing testimony. This young lady knew how to serve, how to encourage them, and how to pray. Although she wasn’t married, she poured her encouragement, prayers, and service, to those around her, mainly those over her in ministry. She was like Anna serving in the Temple. Her job was to encourage and lift these workers up, day in and day out.

One day she went to the pastors and told them that someone was interested in her, and asked them what they thought? The pastor said at first he thought, “Jane, you could do better than that!”, but when he thought further about it, he realized that there was nothing preventing the marriage from taking place…it was just that they thought of this young man as, how does one say it? As a so-so type of man. It wasn’t that he wasn’t a believer, it was just that he wasn’t the type of man that they had envisioned her marrying. But they told her if she felt he was the one, they would give her their blessing. They couldn’t see any reason for withholding it. They were both believers.

He said he watched their relationship unfold and as all those encouraging words, prayers, and service that they had received from her through the years, got switched over to him, to her then pouring them all out onto this young man! He said before they realized it, this man was on fire for Yhwh and became an amazing man of God and pastor!! He said they all sat back and said “whoa!”. Who they saw, was not at all who she saw. She saw a man of Yhwh. A mighty man of Yhwh. And that is just who this young man became!

He shared about other Godly women through the ages and the impact that they had on their husbands, also great men of Yhwh. He explained, “behind every great man, is a great woman!” Or what I like to think of it as “Behind every great man of Yhwh, is a praying, loving, and encouraging woman!”.

I remembered being in awe of this young lady! She had prepared year after year, on how to become that woman of Yhwh that would bless her man (not in thoughts, but in carrying out who she knew Yhwh wanted her to be, right where she was)! And the years of labor, paid off! She had an incredible marriage because of it!

I can’t even tell you how many times I have listened to this message! I would play it over and over and over again. How did she encourage those around her? How did she serve Yhwh through her prayer life? How did she support those believers around her? I knew, like Mama has told me so many times, “it doesn’t happen over night. You’ve got to be living that life, now, to be able to live it then. Learn on your father and brothers! Learn to encourage them, pray for them, and serve them. And one day, you’ll find the transition to your husband, will go pretty smoothly, because you would have already learned what it takes.” And so I would put my efforts into learning to do, just that. I wanted as much of a head start in all this, as I possibly could get! My dream has always been to be the most amazing, supportive, and loving wife in the world. I wanted to so richly bless my man, that it would overwhelm him! Sure, I knew I would fail. I knew I was sadly, extremely human. But this was my goal. It has been my goal since I was a girl. And it always will be my goal.

Yes, marriage. It’s a beautiful thing. Atleast…it’s supposed to be!

I told you at the beginning of this tale, that I have thought more in terms of our marriage to Yahshua and how what I have seen, has broken my heart. I first wanted to share with you the story about the testimony I have had, concerning what an earthly marriage is supposed to look like, and how that has been my dream. I think I can safely say, it is the dream of almost every young lady! Our dreams are to make our bridegrooms proud to be called ours!

We all agree…marriage is a picture of totally, utterly, and completely, becoming one.

Yahweh tells us that we, His Bride, are one body, but MANY members. This is the picture of unity that we are supposed to have with Him. Yet, as I look around, the body is so torn, fractured, and broken. People are pulling in so many different directions. It’s like a story I heard…there was this carriage being pulled by numerous steeds (horses)…but they weren’t trained horses, so when the driver gave his signal to “go!”, they all went running in different directions! Some to the left, some to the right, some forward, and other’s backwards! And this is what the body has represented thus far. :o(

Instead of longing for marriage, we long for singleness…our independence, we say. It’s almost like, instead of unity being the goal, we instead cherish our independence! If we can’t do it on our own, we won’t do it!! You say “that’s not true!!!” Isn’t it, tho? How are you working with the body? What are you doing? Instead, we think or say (whether by words or deeds), “Work with an imperfect being? No way!! They’re imperfect!!! THEY’RE SINNERS!”

Sisters, do you know how this has got to tear at the very heart of our Saviour? What has happened to us? Instead of being the blushing bride, pouring ourselves out to our Groom, it’s all about what we can get from this marriage…not what we can put into it! Instead of us focusing on how to please our Beloved, we focus on how He can please us! Instead of focusing on what will bring Him exceeding joy and pleasure, we focus on what He can do to bring US joy and pleasure! Instead of relishing who He has created our body to be, we can’t stand the sight of the arm, or the foot, or even our own toe! Instead of being a Bride who builds her house, we have become a Bride who tears her house down with her own two hands (by our words/actions/thoughts/etc).

I look around me (and I am just as guilty!) and listen to the Body talk. It’s all about what they can get out of the body, or out of our Groom, not what we can offer it. Instead of lifting each other up, encouraging each other, blessing each other, it has become all about “I, me, and mine”. Instead of thanking each other for showing us a higher standard to try to achieve, we tear each other down, because we don’t appreciate that reminder that we are imperfect. Any part of the Body who is different, forget it. They are wrong, they don’t belong as part of the Body, so we cut them off!! I am watching arms and legs, and mouths, and eyes, get totally amputated right off…when there was absolutely nothing wrong with them! They were just as Yhwh needed them to be, imperfections and all…just like you and I are (and this doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t strive to be all Yhwh wants us to be!).

My precious sisters, when will we start to see the spiritual marriage, through Yhwh’s eyes? When will we look at our other arm and praise Yhwh for making us in His likeness, in His Image, and instead of trying to get it amputated, build it up, strengthen it, encourage it to be all that it can possibly be…and yes, even letting it know how thankful you are for Yhwh blessing your life with this precious limb? Do you know how blessed we truly are?

I think of so many I have met through Joni and Friends, a ministry for the disabled I have been blessed to minister with. What some of them would give to have their other limbs back! Yet here we are, we have them, but don’t want them!!! We simply don’t see the need for them! Why? Has Ha’Satan blinded us to such a point that we can no longer see what is right before our very eyes? We are all members of the SAME BODY! Why are we acting as tho we love being single limbs, being able to be about our own business, loving our individuality, instead of being about the work that Yhwh has called us, as His Bride, to do? How long will our Groom weep over His Bride? How long will we hold ourselves aloof from Him? He’s knocking, He’s calling out to us…will we answer His call? Will we welcome Him, as a spotless, pure, and whole Bride, a Bride adorned for her Beloved Groom?

Sisters, when will we stop looking for what we can get out of this marriage/church/body, but instead look for ways we can pour ourselves into it? When will we stop trying to have our Groom make us full of joy and give us pleasure, instead of striving for ways that WE can give HIM joy and pleasure? When will we sing forth His praises?

We say we can hardly wait to boast about the man who Yhwh blesses us with, but when will we start boasting about our GROOM? When will we, the Body, be whole again, so we may truly become one with our Groom? Do we truly find our all, in Him? Do we truly pour ourselves out to and for, Him? Do we truly love Him with our whole heart, soul, strength, and mind? Do we wake up with a smile on our face and ask Him how we can bless HIM today? What can we do for HIM today? What would bring HIM joy and pleasure today?

I smile as I think back to when my sister was betrothed to her husband and how she would pour over each and every word in each and every single letter he sent her! Oh, how she treasured each word from him!!! Do we treasure our Husbands words with such fervor? Such joy? Such anticipation? Do we bathe in His every word?

People often tease me that they can hardly wait for the day when I start a relationship. I guess we all know it will be shouted from the rooftops! And just like my parents will tease my siblings that they are the ones who really got the better spouse, so will us children fight and argue over who got the better one! Yes, all in good teasing and jest, of course! But my point is, do we do the same with our King? Do we boast about who He is? Do we sing forth His praises near and far and loudly? Do we let everyone know just Who our Husband is? His goodness to us? What His amazing, forgiving, unending, and unconditional love is like? Does the world look at our relationship with Him, with awe and amazement at how incredible it is? Does it make them want what we have? Or do they look at our marriage and say “I never want that kind of marriage! I’d rather be single the rest of my days, than be in that relationship!”

Sisters, remember, it’s not just about Yahshua and you. You are only a tintsy wintsy little member of the whole unit! The marriage we represent with Yahshua is made up of a complete body.

You can not possibly become one with just a finger or toe. It takes two bodies to become one. Let me ask you again, are you building that marriage, are you pouring into that marriage, are you working to better that marriage, or are you tearing that marriage down with your very own hands? We have the power to do either. It’s up to us. Which will we work at? Which will we strive for?

How I pray we will truly pour our all into this Marriage! For nothing, NOTHING is more important, nor more glorious, than this! Yhwh didn’t marry perfect spouses. So stop looking for perfection. You won’t find it. All of us are marred…that’s why it has to take ALL of us, to make up a complete body! But this is a beautiful picture!!! We desperately need each other. It’s how Yhwh created us. It’s how He wanted it. Relish it. Cherish it!! And be your part in it.

Posted in Challenges, Choices, Faith, Family, Friendships, Godly Daughterhood, Holiness, Intentional Living, Loving God, Serving Others, Serving Yahweh, Using our talents | 2 Comments