Be Still and KNOW that I am Yhwh thy God

Shalom my precious girls,

(I realize the format in this post is terribly messed up and it’s due to my only having notepad on my pc right now, as I had to leave before my Office cd came in the mail. So please just bear with me for a few more post and hopefully I will get a program loaded back on my laptop :o)

I mentioned in the last post about my possibly going overseas for 6 months and prayers taking longer than I expected for
them to be answered. I would like to share a little bit more about this journey Yhwh has brought me down, in hopes that it will be an encouragement to you,
as it has definitely been for me…and a reminder that none of us should ever forget what He has said.

Through the years, Yhwh has laid different things on my heart and shared different things with me. One of which, was serving in Israel. For years now, I have felt Him
calling me there. In fact, my heart had been in Africa for many, many years before (pretty much since I was a young believer), but I felt Him clearly tell me that my
heart was in the wrong place and it needed to be in Israel. At that point, I really had no desire to even go to Israel, let alone serve there. I began a journey of pouring
my heart out to Him and asking Him to give me a love for His people, like He had. I wanted to be where He wanted me, and I wanted to love the people He had called me
to love…and not just love, but to love them like HE loved them! I needed him to do a heart transplant, and He did a complete one in record time!
I know I have shared this story with you all before, how He told me to get into the book of Isaiah, and to keep reading it over and over again! You can not (in my humble
opinion!) read that book WITHOUT getting a heart for His people!
My heart began to change and a love began to sprout within it, that I can’t even describe. Within 8 months, I was standing on Israeli soil! He had my heart, and He had blessed
me with the most amazing month of my life. Just before I left, I felt Him tell me to get a certain ring, as a reminder of His love for me and as a reminder that He would always
be there with me, He would never leave me nor forsake me, and as a reminder that He WOULD bring me back! We had just had a walk together and I began just crying out to Him.
He had my heart where He wanted it, why was He now sending me back? But I felt Him tell me I wasn’t ready just yet, and He had more work to do in me, and had more work
for me to do back home (where I lived).

Week after week passed, month after month, and year after year. I thought surely He would bring be back within a year! But no, He had other plans still. And one year turned
into two, and two into almost three. March 26 would have been the three year mark for when I first arrived in Israel. Then for the first time this past fall/winter, I felt
Him tell me that it was time to return! I was soooo excited! Beyond excited! Knowing a little bit from prayer as to what He wanted me to do while there, I began searching
as to where and how long I was to be gone for. One lead led to another, and finally, to the most amazing place ever. At that point, there wasn’t any question that this was
where He wanted me to be and I sat there marvelling at His goodness! It was a home caring for the elderly believers in the land. I thought back over the past three years,
and everything He had me doing, was in preparation for preparing me so that I qualified to do what I am about to be doing. It was amazing! With my parents blessing, I sent
my application in. I thought surely I would hear right away. Nope. Yhwh had still other plans. He had a lesson He wanted to drill home to me, before sending me.

“Be still and know that I am YHWH thy God”.

Day after day, week after week, eventually turned into a months time. I had been in contact with a lady there before, but now all I heard was absolute silence. I began to waver.
I questioned if I had even heard Yhwh correctly. Why was I so sure, yet now, all I got was silence? Had I really made everything up in my mind, or had I heard Him loud
and clear? If so, why the silence? Everything became a question. What was He doing? Things weren’t exactly going as I had planned or thought He wanted.
But as I sought His face, really sought His face, He began to remind me of all He had once told me. Scriptures came back. Things He had me doing to prepare me, all came
back. I felt like the Israelite’s who had been told, had been shown, yet soon forgot. They started questioning Yhwh’s goodness, His truth, and what He had told them He was
doing. I sat there and told Yhwh I was so sorry for even doubting Him at His word. I found I was no different than the Israelite’s. He brought Sarah back to my mind. Yhwh
had told them He would bless them with a son. But when year after year passed on by, and she soon found that even her childbearing years had gone by, and still no son had been born,
she began to doubt. Maybe Yhwh didn’t intend to give HER a son. Maybe He intended to provide for her in a different way. We all know the story. Hagar came into the picture
and with her, a son who has hated Yhwh’s chosen from the first day. It wasn’t how Yhwh had intended to provide for her. He meant what He had said. He would give Abraham and
HER a son, not Abraham and Hagar a son. Yet because she doubted, and thus made things happen in her own way of reasoning, look at the mess that came about. They had heard
Yhwh correctly. But trust began to falter, as time passed on.

When Yhwh tells us something, will we listen? Will we follow? Or will we grow weary and begin to doubt we ever heard Him correctly? Will we take things into our own hands and
just assume He had other ways He intended to use us, other than what He had told us? Or other places, than where He had told us He wanted us?

But as soon as I had come to this place, feeling more and more settled that I had heard Him right, all of a sudden, the doors swung open wide! The very next morning, I heard
back and within two days, heard that I was approved and that we needed to start the visa application process and get things moving! I wanted to cry. I wanted to shout.
I wanted to sing for joy. I found myself so incredibly thankful for Him bringing me down the path He had, through the waters He had, to the place I was now at. It was
a testing for sure to see if I would follow Him, and although I didn’t know it at the time, although sensed it a couple of times, I now knew for sure. Would I be a Sarah,
or would I follow Him and trust Him to lead me each step of the way…giving me the strength that I needed for the journey He had me on?

Girls, listen to your heavenly Father and stand strong! When He says “be still”, be still! When He says He has called you to a place, trust that He has, and that He will
provide a way. When His timing isn’t ours, don’t change His will, to fit into your time-frame, or doubt Him at His word, simply because we think things should have happened
already. That month of silence taught me more than I can ever say. It stretched me. It tried me. But it has also confirmed things in a whole new way for me. It has deepened
my dependency upon my God, it has shown me how weak I am without Him, and how I need Him at each and every single step of the way! I can’t do this in my own strength. I don’t WANT
to do this in my own strength! And I know that these next 7 months are going to be trying, to say the least. But knowing I am in the center of His will, is more comforting
than I could ever possibly explain. Although I will miss everyone dearly, I am excited to finally be preparing, and finally getting to His field! And I look soooo forward
to what He will accomplish and teach me while I am there! I look so forward to how He will use me, while I am there!

But in all this, I can’t ask you enough to keep me in your prayers as I venture to this new field of service He is calling me to. Especially as forms are filled and sent,
meetings with the interior happen, for preparations to go smoothly, especially that I would know what to bring and what I shouldn’t, etc. I had to laugh as I arrived down here
to Boston, to care for a precious elderly friend of mine who had hurt himself. As I took my first bus here in the states, had to deal with trains, and had my first experience
of taxi life. Me being in the innocent gal that I am, and who has only had two taxi rides her entire life, one of which was with my father, the other one, one that he had
set up for me. Well, lets just say, as my friend said “girl, he saw you coming!”. This country girl doesn’t know much about the ins and outs of city living. He had told
me to either take the taxi or subway (which would require another change in stations to get to the correct train I needed), and on my way there, a man asked if I would like
a taxi ride there (to my train)? Its only a mile away, so I said “sure”. First mistake, he didn’t have a meter, and second was, I didn’t know you had to ask him how much
before he left! I just assumed it would be the same price and forgot that we do not live in a righteous world. I got there and about fell over when he told me (yes, an older
man who we had been having a very nice conversation together) that it was $25! Mind  you, my bus ticket for a 6 hr ride was $35! But what do you do. As I told L, it’s a lesson
I guess I had to learn and glad I learned it BEFORE leaving the country! So its been amazing as Yhwh prepares me in how to deal with the public transportation’s, as I have never
had to deal with this before…not really. Getting on one train is one thing. Swapping tracks, trains, subways, taxi’s, buses…it’s a whole new world for me. So definitely
keep me in  your prayers and that Yhwh would show me how to navigate around Israel. I thank Him constantly for my smartphone and apps that help with such things! :o)

Also, as it stands right now, I should be leaving sometime the end of March/early April. Pretty much as soon as I get the paperwork over there, I will have a date. I will
try to keep you girls updated, but if things become a bit quiet again, you know why! (I will try to write that article about the passage of scripture tomorrow!)

So until later,
Yours truly,

This entry was posted in Conviction, Faith, Godly Daughterhood, Israel, Seasons of Life, Serving Others, Serving Yahweh, Trusting God. Bookmark the permalink.

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